happy burbday

actually it's already 1.30am of 13th july. i intentionally edited the time and date to make this post come on the 'right' time. haha. happy birthday to my friend JUN YUEN. and happy birthday to my friend, carrie's mother. haha. i totally agrees with what baobei mentioned in her blog:

Why can't we all share the same birth date,
because i hate it when i missed someone's birthday,
Make it a wish or a celebration.

haha. luckily 9 days ago i haven't forget 8poh's big day AGAIN, and luckily today i didn't forget jun's birthday. lol. anyway, with that i send my most sincere wishes to all my friends. and i deeply apologize if i forget anyone's birthday again in the future. trust me, i really mean to remember ALL of the dates, but i often forget what date is today though i remember what day is your birthday. Zzzz... forgive my blurr-ness.

HApPY BirtHDaY
8poh ---> 3rd july
turtle ting ----> 7th july
jun ---> 12th july
...
any others?
remind me please...

with lots of loves,
kaiwei :)

8poh, i think u owe me sth.
where's the photo of ur bday prezzie that u promised?
haha..
i'm still waiting...

recently

was quite busy in the first week of university life. went into debate competition. i guess nobody can imagine that i was in a debate team. what is more, i was in MALAY debate team. Zzz... someone who has no at all experiences, no at all talent, was in a debate team, as representative of my residential college. haha. but that's not a big deal anyway, because it was just one of the programme under orientation week. but i was still nervous! during the preparation, our penyelia kolej warned us,"kalau tarik diri akan dibunuh, kalau kalah akan dibuang kolej"... so at last... as expected... after the competition... we were asked to pack our luggage that day itself. sobs. that's why i'm at home online-ing writing blog now lo. haihz...

lol. sampat. anyway, some photos of our 1st-time-debate-team will be upload up here as soon as i bluetooth the photos from my senior and friend.

besides the scary debate thingy, UMAC (university of malaya accounting club) had prepared an activity for my course mates also. it's called the I-week. in other words, seniors-juniors interaction week. i didn't manage to join the full programme because of debate competition. quite a regret for me, but what to do, i have no other choice when these two important event clashed. but still, i enjoyed myself pretty well in there. (exception when during all the talks...) photos of that... i'm not so sure whether i can get it from seniors or not, but i'll try. hehe.

came back home from college this early in the morning. went back to pedas visit grandparents. it has been almost 3 weeks since i last go back to pedas. miss 阿公 and 阿女麻 very much ler... accompany grandpa to our fruits farm this evening. for what? haha. feed mosquitoes la. you know, besides durians and rambutan and mangosteen and duku langsat and longkong and cempedak and trees and grass and rivers... mosquitoes are ubiquitous in this place wert. well lapfoong, now you know why i said i was feeding mosquitoes la... lol.

grandpa. attacked by a kingdom of ants when he pluck the pulasan. stupid ants...

maid in my grandparent's house. she actually climbed up to a tree and collect this full pail of "malaysia's grapes". quite a tough women. and friendly :)

duku langsat...i think. duku langsat and longkong are hard to differentiate okay...

of course, the 'sweet couple'. haha. kakak was the one holding camera. so sorry for the senget photo.

warm regards,
kaiwei :)

call me "mahasiswi" ^.^

half-closed eyes, half-closed brain, half-dead strength... still, i'm staying up here to proudly announce, i'm officially UM mahasiswi now. haha. by the way what's 'mahasiswi' in english huh? university student? lol.

i went registered myself in UM last sunday. gone through one week orientation programme at the same time being quarantined in our college, not even a step outside our college area until this very last day. according to rumuors, university orientation programme is said to be scary and tough and suffering and hell-ly, also it is said to be ragging happening all over the time. haha. duh.. RUMOURS. or perhaps i am lucky. i got 10th college in UM - kolej tun ahmad zaidi. we had gone through the orientation prog under a completely friendly atmosphere. the pm (pembantu mahasiswa) are all nice and kind and friendly, and of course, they are excellent and marvellous and powerful! hehe. i guess almost everyone of us enjoyed ourselves especially in the last few days, especially when learning and practising college cheers, especially when competing ourselves with other groups in all games and extivities, especially in the extremely formal yet extremely unformal event in DTC this morning.

the second we finished the 'angkat sumpah' ceremony, we're officially called mahasiswa and mahasiswi of Universiti Malaya. honestly i do feel a bit 'touchy' when i heard our PM said "selepas angkat sumpah ini kamu semua telah digelar sebagai mahasiswa dan mahasiswi UM dah... " hmmm... i still remember the time when i was still young, when my dad drove us pass by UM campus, he said about how good is it to be in university, (for their time getting in uni is not easy) today is a very very far away future for me at that time. but it seems like with just a split of seconds... boom.. here am i, UM accountancy 1st year freshie... hmmpph................ *tears rolling out*

the whole orientation programme ended quite late, about 7pm today, including having our dinner after the 'touchy' yet exciting closing by our PMs la. then... as i need to settle the jpa sholarships application (none stop with sholarships application but never heard i get any hor? haha) and to get some daily necessities from my home.... i decided to roll back home. hehe. well...well...well... *欠打的样子* it's only 20minutes car distance from UM and my home wert. the most PROUD-able thing is, i have to be back to college by 8am tomorrow morning. ha-ha-ha. NEVER MIND, it's near! Zzz~

anyway, no photos for this post yet. all still with our PM, together with all videos we'll have about 26G i guess. yeah, that's a lot... haha. will catch up with you guys again very soon, have to sleep now. lack of sleep and over-working for one whole week! good night!

kaiwei :)

moment together

hehui and jijian's birthday

group photo. just 4 of us, but it was a sweet memorable night.

clean and clear. haha. choc cheese and choc indulgence. duh... when will we stop with choc indulgence?

unfair! i haven't got any single photo with limhehui alone though i had known him since....standard 5! zzz... nice photo anywhere, stupid look of babi lim.

now i realised how short am i. solid proof! sobs... T.T

look out point gathering

girlss
this fish and chips taste....well u can see from our expression.

the only group photo, but blurr because i haven't done with the right setting in my camera. too many ppl, so 不好意思 to ask everyone to look up and re-take.

小哥哥... he don't even remember i used to call him like this.

went to a toilet in a restaurant next to the mamak. and saw this board. funny, though.

this was taken outside the no-shitting toilet. yea, how earger-to-use-camera are we.

lurves,
kaiwei :)

photos of yesterday tomyam steamboat at my house are all still with jijian. not many though.

adieu, holiday

FUN OK with yoongying and hehui for lunch. chit-chat for a while. simple yet great afternoon. haven't meet yoongying for ages though our house only separated by another few houses. yea, in the same row. haha. we talked about one decision i made 3 years back, and the options available at that moment. she asked me whether i will still choose the same option if it is NOW, after knowing what happens next. well, i found myself kind of speechless. no idea. maybe yes. maybe no. but what is for sure, i'll be more mature and responsible for the decision made, by myself, no matter what or who is it.

went swimming with hh at bandar tun razak swimming pool in the evening. my swimsuit and google were left untouched in ex-kakak's room for almost a year. and finally, they are put on me again. haha. i enjoyed the 'watery' 1 hour pretty much. partly because i haven't swim for long. partly because who i spent my time with. well, i think i'm appreciating every chances we have to spend time together now because there will be so little chances left after 2 + 1/2 months. i wonder will i feel awkwardly unusual when i can no longer call up or receive your call anytime asking 'hey, wanna go for movie later?' ...

reached home a little bit late for dinner after the swim. twinge of qualms stirring inside me, but i knew they won't leave without me. well, family. hehe. sitting in a round table, having my papa, mummy and didi besides me for dinner is one precious moment i know i'll miss very much after tonight. well, of course, i'll still be around at home every weekend (almost :P) but still...not as everyday as now. i remembered few months back, the sheepish excited feelings when i call '阿公吃、阿女麻吃、爸爸吃，妈咪吃”, after i was away from home for like...few weeks. haha.

i'm going to depart to UM tomorrow morning. i'm extremely lucky because when i plan to depart at 8am, i'll reach my destination before 9am. a friend told me, he is planning to leave his home 4am, reaching his destination probably about the same time as me, or even later. imagine how many times he can go back home yearly! woosh... thinking about tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and many many tomorrow ahead of me. a mixture of emotions urge forward. excited. relief. anxious. worry. hopeful. happy. upset. but basically, i'm looking forward to flipping the brand new page of my life. wish me luck everyone! and of course, wish you guys good luck as well! lee yen, don't forget to meet me at UM as my junior a year later. haha.

i managed to excavate one small part of my previous post. i listed down these so-called holiday plans.
Holiday PLanS:
1. sleep kao kao! ZzzZZ...
2. play kao kao! SSSssSs...
3. eat kao kao! Yum yum...
4. accompany grandpa and grandma. gonna stay with them for 1 or 2 weeks and accompany grandpa go vacation.
5. hang out with friends. 8 poh, bao bei, yan, ju and the entire pi family are on the top list. babi hehui, and hk also of course...
6. hook up with some nice novels. it has been ages since i last read any novel.
7. roll back to petrosains to play while earning some pocket money.
8. make some nice presents for parents and friends.
9. tidy up my messy room and house.
10. erm.. ermm.. still thinking.
*these are some extras*
11. celebrated 8poh's bday in advance. sorry for the coincidental clashing of my compulsory orientation and your big day. wear that prezzie from me next friday!
12. updated my loveleefamilee blog which had been abandoned for more than a year. i hope i'll still consistantly update it with some photos or news in our family.
13. successfully held a gathering with ex-sbs-ians and mini gathering with dear gaharuians and few damarians and 2 pendatang asing >.<
14. i found back the happy kaiwei. finally almost-ended some troublesome trouble.

haha. i'm glad i didn't overestimated myself because the list are all easily manageable. so, for the 1st time ever, my plan succeed. though there were still some time where i nearly bored to death waiting for carrie's and hh's exam to over. now that their exams are finished, yan and ju going to start theirs, and me myself going to start schooling. lol. duh... nevermind that :)

cheers. for the end of my holiday, and for the start of my new stage of life.

with loves,
kaiwei :)

i'm sorry with this all-words-no-photo post.

不要错放了幸福温暖的手

found this meaningful passage in cousin's blog. so i'm sharing it up here with everyone. hope he don't sue me for intruding his copyright. lol >.<

往往许多人在抉择伴侣时，容易东想西想，不知所措，就是因为害怕一时做错决定, 看错人，造成终生的遗憾。 诺贝尔文学奖得主萧伯纳说：“此时此刻在地球上，约有两万个人适合当你的人生伴侣，就看你先遇到哪一个， 如果在第二个理想伴侣出现之前，你已经跟前一个人发展出相知相惜、互相信赖的深层关系，那后者就会变成你的好朋友，但是若你跟前一个人没有培养出深层关系，感情就容易动摇、变心，直到你与这些理想伴侣候选人的其中一位拥有稳固的深情， 才是幸福的开始，漂泊的结束。

爱上一个人不需要靠努力，只需要靠“际遇”，是上天的安排，但是“持续地爱一个人” 就要靠“努力”， 在爱情的经营中，顺畅运转的要素就是体谅、包容与自制 (面临诱惑有所自制)。有许多人总是被际遇”所迷惑与苦恼，意念不停、欲念不断、争逐不散，而忘了培养经营感情的能力才是幸福的关键。

所以不要去追问到底谁才是我的Mr.Right，而是n问说在眼前的伴侣关系中，我能努力到什么程度、成长到什么程度，若没有培养出经营幸福的能力，就算真的Mr.Right出现在你身边，幸福依然会错过的，而活在犹疑与遗憾当中，这不就是许多“爱情虚无症”的遭遇与心态吗？

若你此刻已有一位长久相伴的伴侣，不要再随便三心二意地犹疑了，我们往往不易察觉感情中的一个陷阱，就是“近亲生慢侮”，也就是经济学中的铁律“边际效益递减法则”，跟你在一起越久的人，就越容易麻木与忽视，而新鲜的“际遇”总是那么动人可爱。

在感情对待中，难免有摩擦与无心的伤害，而且论得罪自己的次数累加起来最多的人，当然是跟我们在一起最久、最亲近的人。而新欢呢，又还没开始有得罪你的机会，再加上他的刻意讨好，所以新欢怎么看怎么可爱，旧爱怎么看怎么讨厌。但别忘了，新欢身上总是有不确定的未知数，旧爱身上就是有难得的熟悉感、确定感、信赖感。千万不要随便在偶然的“际遇”中迷失了自己，错放了幸福温暖的手。

所以萧伯纳的话，是要提醒情人不要太钻牛角尖于寻觅那唯一，应该把精神用在学会经营幸福的能力上，同时也提醒我们“弱水三千只取一瓢饮”若有幸遇到了难得的伴侣，就不要再三心二意了， 因为我们永远不知道一生何时会遇到两万个其中的几个，所以要知福惜福、活在当下。

officially, i have been single for almost a year. but un-officially, it was just a few months back since i actually completely pull myself out from any whatsoever relationship. (those who knew will know what i'm crapping here, those who don't know, i don't think you need to know it. haha) honestly, sometimes i do feel lonely, especially seeing friends around me are having their sweet and lovely partner in their life. i do long for a someone special to be with me... SOMETIMES only la. haha.

i used to be a lousy girlfriend, (and i know i will still be one IF i have a boyfriend now) that's one of the reason why my heart is not open for anyone to enter yet. i'm simply just not ready for it. however, i did learnt a lot from my previous relationship. what a pathetic, people tend to start learning only after they have no turning back in mending the mistakes committed in the past. haha. somehow, i am still naive-ly looking forward to meet my Mr Right someday later, and i believe when the 'someday' comes, i will able to make myself not the best, but at least a better girlfriend to my HIM.

before this, i think if we really love each other, all the difficulties and problems can be overcome easily as these two lovers can hold their hands tight and solve them all together. when a couple break up, whatever reasons they give are not true except one - one or both of them don't love each other anymore. but after that, i realized i was wrong. erm, not all, but i was partially wrong. there are, many many other factors to be taken into consideration when we decide to start a relationship with someone. (well of course, this is provided we hope to bring this relationship as the last relationship in our life) during the process, if we found out that there are many differences between us, how much we can tolerate with each other will decide the ending of this relationship. ohya, not to forget, also how much we can control ourselves from doing something stupid which can blow the whole thing up. there are few forbidden lines that nobody can afford to cross over. and if one really did, that's it, life-time regret. lol.

duh... enough of craps. in this middle of the night, i don't actually manage to align my words with my thoughts properly. sorry for the crappy opinion of mine. however, i still think the excerpt from my cousin's blog is meaningful. hehe. good night. Zzzz...

kaiwei :)

sometimes i feel contented
sometimes i feel empty
sometimes i feel nothing
but most of the time
i feel blurr...
:P

Happy Papa's Day, again

this post is also a direct copy from familee blog. duh, they have the same author anyway, just different readers. *blink blink*

did i mentioned that i want no more last minute work for the following days and months and years? well, i broke my words. haha. it seems like i had hooked up to a bad habit: sleepless night on every eve of any special events.

the idea of this gift was lingering on my mind over the previous weeks, ever since i was screwing up my brain for mummy's day present. brilliant-est idea without action=zero. until... yeah, last night. since i had once again (and many more again coming over) postpone my whatever brilliant idea until the very very last minute, i expect just a simple wishing card like what i did on mother's day. and then... lol. i don't know. maybe i was out of my mind. haha.

to be exact, the photo vase is for both mummy and papa. hope it does make itself a nice decoration in our home :D

here are the 2 little last-minute-gift-makers and our gift recipient. thanks didi for helping me, though you really did looked sleepy that time. *touchy tears falling*

hao gor gor said i'm damn ss putting my own big photo on the bottom. akhem. i really didn't mean to dominate the space. focus on the love shape instead of the face behind it okay! Zzz~

the side/back view of the vase.

with loves inside us,
we see not just faces inside the photos.
we also see happiness, and family bond.

in this family, we don't tell each other we love, or we care.
in this family, we understood well enough that we do love, and we do care,
even without telling.

but, still...
" papa and mummy, i love you"
。。。muakks。。。

forever your precious girl,
kaiwei :)

when i have to be away from home
i started to realize how important is my family
secretly i promised myself
i will try my very best to make them proud of me
and try my very best to avoid hurting them