there are times
when i am lost
when i am indecisive on which direction should i go next
when i am doubtful on myself
when i am feeling so lonely on the route of making things work
at these times
i feel like i am going to collapse
i feel like the whole world is turning their back to me
i feel like no one is going to hear my cry
i feel like no one is going to see my tears
and i feel like giving up is the best results i can opt to
then i know,
maybe things are not so right anymore.
i should take a halt, a break and a deep breathing in
i should clear my mind, my soul and my heart
and perhaps throw myself some questions that drill back down to the root
"why am i here at the very first place?"
"who am i to be here at the very first place?"
"what am i going to achieve being here at the very first place?"
i ponder, ponder and i am still pondering...
being in this position, carrying this heavy burden on my shoulder,
what are the values that i am able to create for myself, the committees, the juniors and of course the event itself?
and most importantly, how should i follow closely to continuously add values to these people throughout my planning?
yes, people learn and grow from every falls.
but before i put myself in the steep route which is of high risk to falling
shall i ensure myself are well prepared with all equipment to hold the pain of falling?
so that after every falls, i am always ready to keep moving forward from the point of falling instead of going back to the starting point and start all over again.
yes, i shall get myself ready.
and if it is not now, when else can it be?
perhaps today i am lost in the mist,
and the days before today i was lost in the mist too
but after today,
i will try to find my way out.
and i am sure i will be able to find my way out.
this is a promise to you,
and to myself.
cheers,
kaiwei :)
